Especially in our young, carefree, single days, we dream of the future and imagine without reservation the things God has in store for us, hardly conceiving anything less than incredible. Rightly so, it's true, because that's the character and nature of a Daddy who is crazy in love with His kids.
But then, without fail, deserts come up out of nowhere and the blistering heat takes our breath away. How do you cope?
ironically, as I'm typing this with pandora playing in the background, The Desert Song by Hillsong began to play.
It seems the life I dreamed of is so far beyond my reach right now. I'll first say that since moving back to Texas I no longer feel I'm in the spiritual desert I've been in, but there's still the emotional desert of unmet expectations and hardships.
There's a reason women were not created to be the sole provider in a family - its too stinkin stressful! My heart's greatest desire is to be here for my husband right now, and be home with Josiah when he comes. Circumstances seem to be dictating otherwise, and I'm in desperate need of grace, of favor, of provision. Part of my heart says don't be lazy, get a second job and prepare for when you'll be on maternity leave. The other part says trust God, that He'll provide while I can't work. And I'm just crying out to God to give my husband a job! I just want someone to see our circumstance and hire him for cash work!
Deserts do not last forever. There are many reasons we go through them, but God never intended them to last forever. And deserts aren't someplace that God sticks us and says see you when you make it out! He is here, and no matter what happens, God will NOT leave me here to rot and die! I believe I will be able to look back on these times, how God strengthened us in ways that can only come through deserts, and gladness and rivers of joy will overflow in my heart. Right now, friends, I ask for your prayers for grace and strength in these uncertain and difficult times.
In every season, He is still God, and I have a reason to sing, a reason to worship.