Monday, July 25, 2011

(dis)contentment

.:contentment:.
such an impossible word in my life
my whole life it's always been about what's next.
in junior high i wanted to be in high school. in high school i wanted to graduate. when i was an intern at Teen Mania, i wanted to be a second year intern, then a third year, then i wanted to be on staff.
when i was single i wanted to be married.
when we got married and were living in other people's homes, we wanted a place to call ours.
so God gave us a sweet little apartment in dallas, that no one else lived in but us.
now i want to be in a house.

oh dear me.

we are so blessed to be in this little place to call ours, yet my heart is never content.

God forgive me for so quickly setting aside your blessings and wanting something different. help my heart to be content and thankful for where we are right now.

hallelujah, hallelujah
whatever's in front of me
help me to sing hallelujah
hallelujah, hallelujah
whatever's in front of me
i'll choose to sing hallelujah

2 comments:

Renee said...

Oh, this is a chronic issue for me, too. A month or two ago, I read a book called "One Thousand Gifts" by Ann Voskamp. I thought it was fantastic. The subtitle is something about "daring to live fully right where you are" or something like that. I found it really spoke to my many of my issues of discontent, particularly as it relates to God's plan for my life.

Also, I heard a sermon a few weeks ago by this one preacher I know where he highlighted the fact that Paul says he "learned" to be content whatever his circumstances. It isn't necessarily our natural state. I hadn't thought much about that before, but now I think that contentment is something that I need to practice and train for. Not always easy to do, but a goal worth reaching for.

- Kailene said...

I've heard about that book by Ann Voskamp, too. And Yes - I can relate to the whole "what's next?" dilemma. It's hard to find the balance between being excited about the future and content with where you are now. I think that gratitude is HUGE in conquering this - which is what Ann's book is all about. If I can recognize things that I am grateful for everyday, and at the same time acknowledge that I don't know what will happen tomorrow - my plans are uncertain, then I will rest in what God has given me today. (at least it sounds good on paper. haha)