The Tastes that Bring Back Memories

Currently I'm sitting in Starbucks, trying to get internet (think I'm having computer issues?!), and drinking a vanilla chai latte. (Notice I'm only wearing my wedding band? Yeah, the engagement ring doesn't fit right now. Kind of glad I never had the time to get this ring resized, or get the rings fused.)

The taste of sweet memories <3

I remember sitting in the hotel room of the Holiday Inn in Norman getting ready with my bridesmaids, and our photographer showed up with a vanilla chai latte just for me. And now, that taste brings me back to our wedding day - every single time.

I love these people so much. These girls are my best friends. They are wives, they are mothers, they are daughters, and they are answers to deep desires and prayers for good friendships. And the guys are pretty great too ;-)

I love this man more and more each day. It's only been 9 months, but our love has grown so much. God is so, so, so perfect that he would bring this man into my life. To think back two summers ago when I completely rejected him and had no desire to date him - ahhh thank you God that he didn't give up on me!!

Here's to sweet memories, weddings, and vanilla chai lattes :-)

Faith Isn't Easy

It's not easy to day after day trust God that He will provide when the bank account and logic continually says otherwise. It's not easy to trust God day after day when you don't know what the future holds, when you don't know if your husband's immigration will be approved, when you don't know if he'll ever be able to get a job here, when you don't know when you'll get paid, when you don't know what life will be like under these circumstances and adding a baby to the mix, when you don't know how you'll insure said baby.

Faith is simply not easy.

What is easy is letting these things weigh me down, to crumble emotionally, to distance myself from God. But I need faith. I often ask God for peace, but I think faith comes first. (And faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God...so distancing myself from God obviously isn't going to help!)

"When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow you. When you walk through the fire, you shall not be burned, nor shall the flame scorch you." -Isaiah 43:2

We are in a fire right now that we are choosing to walk through together, trusting God rather than looking for an easy way out. But God promises that we will not be burned nor scorched, that he is with us.

*Financial doubt & uncertainty is a flame

*Uncertainty about immigration is a flame

*Having a baby, the unknown that awaits, is a flame

We will NOT be burned, not scorched, not touched by these flames. There is a refreshing rain on the other side. There will be a road in this wilderness and a river will be found in this desert. (Isaiah 43:19).

At A Loss For Words

I've tried several times to post what's really on my heart, but can't seem to eloquently get the words out. It's such a rough/dry/weird/unexpected place in life right now, and I wanna talk about all of it. But for now, here's a picture of my amazing husband posing before the start of the Dallas Hottest Half Marathon on Sunday. So proud of my Canadian husband surviving such a dreadfully hot race!

My life these days

Consists of...

Applying this a gajillion times a day. At every nagging itch.

3 capsules, 2x a day. For some reason doctors don't like to recommend herbal supplements, but I did my research on this one and it's perfectly safe during pregnancy. God created it for a reason, right?

Showering and scrubbing this stuff on me 3x a day, in a cold shower. No kidding. It smells like I was just outside in the middle of a campfire, but that's the price we pay.

And the results after 3 days of use? Still unbearable itching, driving me nuts. Gotta give it some time I guess. PRAY FOR ME!!!!!

When You Know Something's Not Right

Okay so I'm mostly asking advice from any woman who has ever been pregnant. But I welcome any advice! Here's the deal.

About 2 weeks ago I started to get this awful nagging rash on the backs of my arms. It came out of nowhere, so I brought it up with my OB doctor, hoping it wasn't pregnancy related. She assured me it wasn't, told me to make sure I don't switch any of my lotions or skin care products, and I'd be fine. I did that, and I'm definitely not fine.

Two weeks later the rash has spread like wildfire, covering my arms, tops of my legs, and as of this morning, covering my legs. I've tried Aveeno lotion, hydrocortisone cream, extra strength hydrocortisone cream, and now calamine lotion a gajillion times a day. Nothing is working and I'm ready to scratch my skin off! My doctor said it's not serious, not pregnancy related, but I've never, ever in all my life had any kind of rash like this.

What should I do?! Does anyone know of some miracle soap, cream, something, to make this unbearable itching go away?!

One hundred what?!

It was probably about -5 degrees in this picture. On Christmas day. I could go lay in this snow, in my swimsuit, right now. Tomorrow it's supposed to be 110 degrees outside.

This heat wave is allllll because I complained about the cold winter in Canada.

I've repented. Now let's start praying for rain and cooler weather!

When August Rolls Around

I get emotional whenever August rolls around now. So many memories associated with it.

August 2007, 4 years ago, I left home to go to the Honor Academy. I couldn't possibly know all that God had in store.

August 2008, graduating the HA, making it through that year, my mom walking, staying another impactful year as a GI.

August 2009, another graduation, saying goodbye to Rob for the next year of our lives, staying a 3rd year at Teen Mania for what would undoubtedly be the best of all of them.

August 2010, leaving the HA after the 3 most incredible years of my life, planning a move to Canada and planning our wedding.

And now, August 2011. It's been a year since I left TM, and now we are planning the arrival of a baby.

I'm emotional thinking about where we are at in life, but also because I'm thinking about the interns that are graduating in a few short weeks and the incredible stories and life changing experiences they are walking away with. And then the incoming intern class who have a few short weeks left with their friends and families, yet they have no idea all that God has in store for them.

How could I have known 4 years ago that God was bringing another man to that same campus who would become my husband, and that He would give us a child. The month of August holds a very special place in my heart. It's almost like another holiday or anniversary - it's a season to be remembered year after year, and its stories will be told to our children. I'll fondly think of God's goodness and His incredible plans for our lives as each August 1st rolls around.

(this is from Fall 2007 with my core, Beloved) :-)